Time off for dependants: ask the expert

I have two children aged seven and one. I returned to work last November. I’ve worked for the company for 11 years and held a managerial position, but after having my children I didn’t feel I could commit to that particular job fully. I therefore returned on an admin basis for two days a week. I love my job and love working the two days. My youngest attends nursery and is at the stage where she is catching everything going. Since starting back at work in November she has had gastroenteritis twice which has meant that I have had a total of three days off counted as ‘time off for dependants’ on two separate occasions. I am fully aware that I won’t be paid for these days and nor do I expect to be. I have just been called into a meeting with my manager to discuss my attendance and he said he has been asked by the director to talk to me to put it in writing. I questioned this and asked what the next course of action would be if either of my children were ill again – after all, I cannot guarantee they won’t be. My manager didn’t really know – he was just acting as the messenger and he actually felt it was an unjust conversation and could see that I had no alternative but to take the time off when the children were ill. My manager asked HR if the meeting had to be documented in writing and they said at this stage it was just a chat. I didn’t feel as if was a chat at all. I feel totally under pressure about the situation and I am worried about what will happen if either of my children are ill again. There are other mums in the office too and they have had time off in the past, but I know that they have not been spoken to and what’s more they have been paid, but I am happy not to be paid. There are also other people within the office who have got far worse attendance records than me and they also have not been spoken to. I feel as if I am always treated differently to everyone else as I’ve worked directly under the director for many years before he was a director. My manager also said he was in a foul mood because his car had been hit before he came to the branch and that may have prompted him to act in the way that he has. Can they put pressure on me for the time I have taken, given that it has been unpaid and taking into account that the illness was short? Please could you advise me? Thanks