December means high stress for couples

December is the most stressful month for couples, a study has revealed.
The study of 3,000 people, shows half argue more during the festive month than at any other time of the year. One  in five are already considering splitting up with their other half this month – while a further one in twenty doubt their relationship will survive.
Money worries, entertaining extended family members and sharing the workload involved over the Christmas period were most likely to trigger bust-ups. Other top concerns at this time of the year include how much to spend on each other and on the children, and a lack of time and attention for each other.
Deborah Jeff, Head of Family Law at west end law firm Seddons, which carried out the research, said: “Although December can be a wonderful time for many families, it can also be a time of stress and strain for others.
“If a relationship is already suffering due to poor communication or lack of time for each other, this will be heightened during a month when we are busy focussing our attentions on keeping other people happy, such as extended family and friends.
“January is a time when we see a significant increase in the number of clients consulting us for advice about divorce and separation.
“But it needn’t get that far.  We work with relationship counsellors who encourage our clients, where appropriate,  to re-evaluate what is important to them in the relationship and look at the bigger picture before divorce or separation are even considered. “The stress of the Christmas period can cause couples to forget all the positive aspects of their relationship.
“By getting some perspective and taking time out for each other, clients can then see whether it was the time of year which led to difficulties or if the relationship was already under strain for other, more significant reasons”. The poll revealed that the average couple will have four rows a day during December – a total of 124 over the month – with money worries the most likely cause. Having to visit the in-laws over the Christmas period came second in the reasons for arguments, followed by someone not doing enough to help out around the house. Having to cook and prepare for guests and visiting friends and family completed the top five.
Other common triggers for December rows included drinking too much at Christmas parties, spending too much money on gifts for the children and even such simple matters as domestic arrangements in the home. Twelve per cent of unfortunate couples admit they argue all the time over Christmas.
Almost one in five even said they were dreading this December because they were anticipating the rows they will have with their partner. For some, the arguments have proven too much with 23 per cent of people considering, or going through with, a separation during December in previous years. But while 39 per cent put this down to the amount of arguments, 16 per cent admitted the separation was simply to avoid buying them a Christmas gift. A third even claimed they like to be single over the festive period.