How to find clarity, confidence and courage in making tough decisions

My journey through to clarity, confidence and courage in making tough decisions took place about eight years ago when I started having thoughts and feelings of confusion, lack of energy and self-doubt that I could not shift.

I needed a change, but wasn’t sure why or what that change was, but I know now that I was procrastinating in not facing it head on. What I came to realise in the end was that actually I just needed to do something because those thoughts and feelings were immobilising me and stopping me from taking my next right step.

Are you feeling confused about your next move perhaps or just know that a move is necessary but are not sure why? Is the fear of a move keeping you stuck or is there a realisation that you have had that you don’t want to accept?

My tips on achieving clarity, confidence and courage

• Don’t ignore the feelings. Lean into to them and listen to what your gut and your head is trying to tell you.
• Try to identify what area of your life these feelings relate to.
• Be honest with yourself about what it is that you might have to do. If you are not sure, asking someone else to make the decision for you will not help.
• Ask yourself what you definitely don’t want to do. That will give some clarity of what you want to do.
• Weigh up the pros and cons of any decision you might take and see what they feel like to you. Remember that growth comes from some discomfort.
• When you have decided what you need to do, focus on it and consider the benefits of your taking that step. It will give you the confidence around your decision.
• Once you have the clarity and confidence, the courage will come because what you will know for sure is that this is the right thing to do for you.

My journey was about leaving a fairly well-paid partnership in a firm of solicitors because I wasn’t feeling the passion for it any more, despite the hard work and achievement that had got me there.

The change I made was to resign without another job to then become a self-employed solicitor working as a consultant because I realised that I needed the freedom that working in this way brought me.

Working through the steps I outline above brought me the clarity confidence and courage that I needed to make the move. Your situation might be different, but would, in my opinion, still need clarity confidence and courage.

Procrastination and limiting beliefs will try to stop you going forward, but that’s where a coach can help in realising what is behind them and moving on from them.

*Lorna Valcin is an employment solicitor and life coach. E-mail: LVcoachingse[email protected]. Facebook: LV Coaching. Instagram: l.v_coaching

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